The Creativity Cow
musings and questions on how we must care for our own supply of sparks
I have been feeling pretty punky lately. Sort of sick, not sick, sick and tired, just plain old tired. Dull. Like a chicken whose golden feathers have all been plucked. Like a creativity cow who has been milked dry. If you are someone who pays all the bills from a job of being an endless well of creative juices, you surely know the feeling. And isn’t that almost all of us, in one way or another?
When I start to feel this way from time to time, I usually end up saying to myself, buck up, stop whining, get back to work. And more often than not, at least temporarily, the work is the answer. Or the answer is in the work. The harder I work, the luckier I get. Isn’t that what Thomas Edison said? Or maybe it was Thomas Jefferson. Whoever said, it’s true. The work is the medicine. I know this from experience, over and over again.
But what if our creativity becomes the fount for other? What if we are teachers, mentors, the ones who beat the gathering drum? I’m learning that might be a very different kind of work than the work of the creator who simply creates their own work. What if our work is to create things that gives others the inspiration and tools to create? Is the work still the medicine?
If we don’t want to completely run dry and feel like that chicken with all of her golden feathers plucked out, we need to make time to grow those feathers again. And isn’t that what the sabbatical is for? Time off to rest and learn and grow and work toward new discoveries as an individual? In the professional workplace, “a sabbatical is an extended break of a month to two years from your job. During that period of time, an employee doesn't report for work or to the employer. Yet they remain employed and, typically, receive a salary (either full or partial). A sabbatical can give you a healthy amount of time to enhance your academic qualifications, pursue new interests, do volunteer work, travel, address physical concerns, or re-prioritize your life and career. It's an opportunity to manage the effects of professional burnout.” 1
It is not a vacation, but a time to invest in yourself in a way that can help you rest, de-stress, while learning something new, developing your own skills and creativity further, and then return to work rejuvenated. Reality: creatives, especially self-employed creatives who probably work 70-80 hour work weeks, have a really hard time justifying this and finding ways to make it happen for themselves. Let’s be real, no self-employed person is going to take two years off for a sabbatical when they usually cannot even justify sick days or bank holidays like the rest of the work force—but maybe it’s time to start planning for seasonal, short sabbaticals?
So often I see amazing workshops I would love to take part in, but know with all of the eggs I juggle it would just get pushed aside and probably never be finished. What if I took two weeks off so I could travel to a workshop, or even dive deeply into one right here at home? Or maybe two weeks off to simply remember what it feels like to be someone creating my own work, which was what gave me the skills, experience (and the desire to share them) to become a teacher in the first place? Why do I even hesitate? Maybe it’s the curse of being self-employed, to always fear the loss of income that might incur, or that if you are not “on” 24/7/365 that your clients might go elsewhere. Whatever the psychology of it, it needs to become the new normal for all self-employed creatives—and still have time for the two-week vacation every year, too.
The truth is that I love my job. I feel so damn fortunate to be able to do what I do, that I feel guilty for taking time away from it. That my luck might change. That I might seem ungrateful. The other truth is that by not taking the time I need for personal development and refilling my well, I set myself up for burn out, over and over again. My creative milk is feeling pretty scant lately. I don’t believe in blocks, but I know it’s important to find ways to get the supply flowing again, and it gets harder and harder the more depleted I allow myself to get.
So I’m curious. What are your thoughts about the sabbatical for the self-employed among us? Are you someone whose employer has allowed to take a sabbatical during your career? I would love to hear about it. Or are you a self-employed person who already makes room for this in your professional life? How do your clients feel when you say, closed for two weeks for personal development? Or maybe you are feeling more like I am, and are in desperate need and don’t know how to make it happen. I would love to know your thoughts and to brainstorm about this together, before the milk runs completely dry.
https://www.investopedia.com/articles/financialcareers/08/sabbatical.asp
I think you should take care of yourself. I'll be here when you get back and I'll keep drawing and writing while you're gone.
I say caring for yourself and your own sanity is what's needed...like on an airplane they say get your own mask on first or on a boat to put your own lifejacket on then work on helping others. If twice a year you "took off" (no emails, no public writings or lessons, no tending of the business) for 1 or 2 (or 3 for that course that draws you!) weeks and post that you are on your semi-annual creativity boosting experience no person following your threads would object...they already know the caring person you are. You can only give what you have in you and you wouldn't want to convey your tiredness or angst but your revitalized joy in the creating. It also shows them, without needing to explain further, that that is a good and worthy practice that they might want to adopt for themselves!