Kateri, you have gone through so much - and to me you sound like a survivor - you exhibit courage, compassion and authenticity! 💕 Your essays here really grab me. Love the little turtle!! You sparked a wonderful memory of my mother here in talking about James Whitcomb Riley's " Little Orphan Annie". -When she and her twin sister were children her mother read poetry and stories to them at bed time and this was her absolute favorite! She could recite that poem and Longfellow's "The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere" ( which is rather long) well into her 90's - we recorded her once without her knowing, when she was about 95 reciting "Little Orphan Annie" - she would become so animated and shrug her shoulders, smiling and giggling. She gave me her old set of at least 5 volumes of J. Whitcomb Riley poems at about that time.
Such wonderful poems. My favourite memory of his poems are from when I had my tonsils out. I think my parents must have given me that book? I honestly do not know. But i surely remember reading it. Thank you, Kathryn. xo
There is something in the air, or what now seems to be often expressed, the universe. Maybe an alignment of the stars, I don’t know much about them. And yet today an energy is running right through the center of me. Kateri you have given a gift. It is a beautiful thing. So, I am thankful you hit that button (when you do) and share yourself, your vulnerable precious self.
In each paragraph, a gem is found, the photos you are drawn to take, the suffering in places dear to the heart, the thought of pets feeling deeply, and all that turmoil and suffering.
I happen to have had similar thoughts yesterday, late afternoon. As I walked through the farm snapping photos of what drew me in, an evening of mixed joy and sadness. Then that pain in the center of my chest, as I woke from dark thoughts of others suffering both far away and close at heart. I felt a foggy mess, unable to write and desperately needing to grasp my thoughts from the shadows. So good to read and see you, as you share your authentic self. This is inspiring. I believe you are on to something very real and important. With deep gratitude, and today a more open heart.🕊️
Kindred spirits in many ways, Judy. It always feels like we need to say, I'm so sorry...when we know someone else is really feeling that infinite ache. I am exploring seeing it in a different way. More of an exquisite ache. Maybe it's okay to walk around with it. Maybe we shouldn't try to make it go away. So foten we try to make it go away. Maybe it's just as beautiful as joy. I honestly don't know... but I am exploring it. Big hug for you. 💖
There are many things here, but I’ll pick one. I’ve always had an ache too. You could call it a depression, but I’ve always thought of it as a perspective. For me it is like a view of things underwater with underwater colors and of that which is coming at me fast, slowed down to an abstract. To live extremely sensitive to the turning points of sadness to joy -joy into sadness and then to hover most of time in between the two can often be misunderstood, but it is the sweetest thing. So my ache is a great shape shifting pendulum in the center of my chest- an opening-a guide-a certain kind of understanding. Thank you for making me feel so not alone in these ways. It was wonderful to listen to the playlist while reading your words. Always grateful for your voice.
I had to read this several times, because I want to feel it clearly. It is so beautiful and meaningful to me, what you have written. I am working on an essay about something similar, but how you have expressed it is similar. I may contact you to quote you from this. Do you know the poem by Neruda, Body of a Woman? The last few lines are so important to me. THe novel I have been working on starts with these lines. Here is one translation:
I watch you from afar through your paintings, through your photography, through your writing. The passion you have for your mark making. You have a voice, a craft, a sound mind soft thoughts with a loud resonance. When you can’t speak your work does, your passion does, your love does. All those tiny marks on a page, be it drawing painting or writing lets you be vulnerable. All of us who care to look deep at your teaching and work and at our own know its importance. You taught me to practice. It would get better, I would get better and I did and will. My life has my paper and supplies packed up but I still doodle and play. I could not draw a stick man before I started with your lessons. Learning to see…Not only outside but inwardly as well, we all have secret demons that haunt us, but when we can mark make in some way the demons have to flee. It makes us creative and that can bring us closer to the Creator. It brings us closer to life inside or out. So you keep writing mark making humming to yourself, hugging, loving, laughing and crying because all of it IS your authentic self. It has been shared with us, your family and the universe, it all gets a little brighter by the sparks you ignite with your pen, your paper pigment and ink. Thank you Kateri for being the best You.
Thank you, Kateri. This was very good for me to read. You will be glad to know that I started drawing again yesterday morning. I need some new pencils, but I used my old stubby ones and am working on a little raccoon. I'll send you a picture of it when I'm finished. I'm trying to do a little every day. And, I'm trying to do a little writing each day too. I'm looking at my elephants again and remembering that I do know how to see...
Well that's about the best news! Would love to see that elephant again. I have so many pencils! Would you like a handful? ❤️ It's about time for breakfast again anyway!
Thank you, Kateri. I finished my first 2024 drawing today. It's kind of cute. I would love some pencils and I would love to have breakfast with you again soon. Just let me know. You can tell me how to get rid of that black dot that is supposed to be me...
This was exactly what I needed today after being vulnerable in an especially messy way recently. It was received well, but I still felt queasy and spent ages thinking about how I could’ve done what I needed to do without leaving my protective shell. Thanks for the reminder that that’s not how it works!
Vulnerability is such an important aspect of our lives. Being vulnerable, recognizing it in others, and talking about it are very difficult for so many. I try to understand it, but I often fall short. I certainly know when I feel vulnerable, but seeing it in someone else takes effort and patience. Something I lack at times. I hate how the word is overused, especially on social media and TV/movies. This was an excellent essay. I look forward to these when they pop up in my email! 😍😍
I’ve known you, as much as we can know someone from a distance, for a while now, and I am always always comforted by and appreciative of the authentic way you show up. Thank you, Sue. You are a treasure.
Beautifully expressed Kateri, again, you have given me much to muse over. Thank you for expressing your vulnerability and history in such a tender way. 💕
Kateri, you have gone through so much - and to me you sound like a survivor - you exhibit courage, compassion and authenticity! 💕 Your essays here really grab me. Love the little turtle!! You sparked a wonderful memory of my mother here in talking about James Whitcomb Riley's " Little Orphan Annie". -When she and her twin sister were children her mother read poetry and stories to them at bed time and this was her absolute favorite! She could recite that poem and Longfellow's "The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere" ( which is rather long) well into her 90's - we recorded her once without her knowing, when she was about 95 reciting "Little Orphan Annie" - she would become so animated and shrug her shoulders, smiling and giggling. She gave me her old set of at least 5 volumes of J. Whitcomb Riley poems at about that time.
Such wonderful poems. My favourite memory of his poems are from when I had my tonsils out. I think my parents must have given me that book? I honestly do not know. But i surely remember reading it. Thank you, Kathryn. xo
There is something in the air, or what now seems to be often expressed, the universe. Maybe an alignment of the stars, I don’t know much about them. And yet today an energy is running right through the center of me. Kateri you have given a gift. It is a beautiful thing. So, I am thankful you hit that button (when you do) and share yourself, your vulnerable precious self.
In each paragraph, a gem is found, the photos you are drawn to take, the suffering in places dear to the heart, the thought of pets feeling deeply, and all that turmoil and suffering.
I happen to have had similar thoughts yesterday, late afternoon. As I walked through the farm snapping photos of what drew me in, an evening of mixed joy and sadness. Then that pain in the center of my chest, as I woke from dark thoughts of others suffering both far away and close at heart. I felt a foggy mess, unable to write and desperately needing to grasp my thoughts from the shadows. So good to read and see you, as you share your authentic self. This is inspiring. I believe you are on to something very real and important. With deep gratitude, and today a more open heart.🕊️
Kindred spirits in many ways, Judy. It always feels like we need to say, I'm so sorry...when we know someone else is really feeling that infinite ache. I am exploring seeing it in a different way. More of an exquisite ache. Maybe it's okay to walk around with it. Maybe we shouldn't try to make it go away. So foten we try to make it go away. Maybe it's just as beautiful as joy. I honestly don't know... but I am exploring it. Big hug for you. 💖
There are many things here, but I’ll pick one. I’ve always had an ache too. You could call it a depression, but I’ve always thought of it as a perspective. For me it is like a view of things underwater with underwater colors and of that which is coming at me fast, slowed down to an abstract. To live extremely sensitive to the turning points of sadness to joy -joy into sadness and then to hover most of time in between the two can often be misunderstood, but it is the sweetest thing. So my ache is a great shape shifting pendulum in the center of my chest- an opening-a guide-a certain kind of understanding. Thank you for making me feel so not alone in these ways. It was wonderful to listen to the playlist while reading your words. Always grateful for your voice.
I had to read this several times, because I want to feel it clearly. It is so beautiful and meaningful to me, what you have written. I am working on an essay about something similar, but how you have expressed it is similar. I may contact you to quote you from this. Do you know the poem by Neruda, Body of a Woman? The last few lines are so important to me. THe novel I have been working on starts with these lines. Here is one translation:
"Dark river-beds where the eternal thirst flows
and weariness follows, and the infinite ache."
The infinite ache. 🩵✨
I’m not familiar with this poem, but I will look it up. I love the line you referenced. Feel free to contact me anytime. 💫💫💫
❤️
I watch you from afar through your paintings, through your photography, through your writing. The passion you have for your mark making. You have a voice, a craft, a sound mind soft thoughts with a loud resonance. When you can’t speak your work does, your passion does, your love does. All those tiny marks on a page, be it drawing painting or writing lets you be vulnerable. All of us who care to look deep at your teaching and work and at our own know its importance. You taught me to practice. It would get better, I would get better and I did and will. My life has my paper and supplies packed up but I still doodle and play. I could not draw a stick man before I started with your lessons. Learning to see…Not only outside but inwardly as well, we all have secret demons that haunt us, but when we can mark make in some way the demons have to flee. It makes us creative and that can bring us closer to the Creator. It brings us closer to life inside or out. So you keep writing mark making humming to yourself, hugging, loving, laughing and crying because all of it IS your authentic self. It has been shared with us, your family and the universe, it all gets a little brighter by the sparks you ignite with your pen, your paper pigment and ink. Thank you Kateri for being the best You.
My gosh, Jane. I’m so touched and so grateful that you choose to stick with me, and that you are here. This means so much to me. Thank you.
Thank you, Kateri. This was very good for me to read. You will be glad to know that I started drawing again yesterday morning. I need some new pencils, but I used my old stubby ones and am working on a little raccoon. I'll send you a picture of it when I'm finished. I'm trying to do a little every day. And, I'm trying to do a little writing each day too. I'm looking at my elephants again and remembering that I do know how to see...
Well that's about the best news! Would love to see that elephant again. I have so many pencils! Would you like a handful? ❤️ It's about time for breakfast again anyway!
Thank you, Kateri. I finished my first 2024 drawing today. It's kind of cute. I would love some pencils and I would love to have breakfast with you again soon. Just let me know. You can tell me how to get rid of that black dot that is supposed to be me...
This was exactly what I needed today after being vulnerable in an especially messy way recently. It was received well, but I still felt queasy and spent ages thinking about how I could’ve done what I needed to do without leaving my protective shell. Thanks for the reminder that that’s not how it works!
Protective shells can be vital, but I think our soul knows when we need to open it up a little. xo
Vulnerability is such an important aspect of our lives. Being vulnerable, recognizing it in others, and talking about it are very difficult for so many. I try to understand it, but I often fall short. I certainly know when I feel vulnerable, but seeing it in someone else takes effort and patience. Something I lack at times. I hate how the word is overused, especially on social media and TV/movies. This was an excellent essay. I look forward to these when they pop up in my email! 😍😍
I’ve known you, as much as we can know someone from a distance, for a while now, and I am always always comforted by and appreciative of the authentic way you show up. Thank you, Sue. You are a treasure.
🤗
stunning, a pause for me just now, to soak in the truths you've offered. thank you, K. x
Thank you, Elena, for being here. For pausing to read my offerings. Truly honoured.
Beautifully expressed Kateri, again, you have given me much to muse over. Thank you for expressing your vulnerability and history in such a tender way. 💕
Oh Sara, thank you. I’m so honoured to have you here. ❤️
So beautifully written and shared with us. We all can probably say we have experienced this in one way or another. But you make it real.
Thank you, mom. Love you.